Lost in translation: The hidden dangers of therapy speak
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In the last few years, the internet and in large part social media, has caused an uptick in discussions around mental health. And while a marked shift in the stigma that was once associated with seeking therapy is definitely a positive thing, one less constructive by-product that is cropping up online and in daily discussions surrounding mental health is the incorrect use of ‘therapy speak’.
According to industry professionals, therapy speak is a “term that refers to the unique and specialized language often used by mental health professionals, therapists, and counselors when interacting with clients or patients.” When used in a professional capacity, therapy speak can and should be used to help the patient and health care provider to better understand patterns of behavior, and communicate effectively.
However, what we’ve seen in a lot of the discourse around mental health lately, is a broad, oversimplified and often incorrect application of common therapy speak terminology. Even just a mild foray into many social media comment sections will have us believing that gaslighting is rampant, people are often triggered, and the lines around boundary-setting have suddenly become blurry.
As an example, arguably the most notorious therapy speak culprit is the term ‘narcissist’. But are we really living through an explosion of narcissism? Likely not. According to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, a person who is medically diagnosed with narcissistic personality disorder is someone who exhibits “a pattern of grandiosity, need for admiration, and lack of empathy.” This is distinctly different from a person who can be difficult to deal with, or one that is prone to act in a selfish manner.
In a recent article discussing the potential problems that therapy speak can cause, family therapist Moe Ari Brown explained that, “pop psychology sometimes lacks a clear definition.”
While it can seem harmless to throw these mental health terms around, professional practitioners urge that we remember that there is a difference between a medical diagnosis and our opinions on people’s bad or problematic behavior in our day-to-day life experiences.
Dr. Saunia Ahmad, director and clinical psychologist at the Toronto Psychology Clinic, describes one of the dangers of misusing therapy speak as the wrongful labeling of people, which can have a long-lasting emotional impact. “It can lead to more stigma and shame, especially for a society where we don't really treat mental illness like other health issues that are physical in nature.”
Overusing therapy speak can also have the effect of minimizing the experiences of both people who have experienced genuine examples of problematic behavior such as gaslighting for instance, as well as those who are actually living with the effects of an authentic medical diagnosis.
Therapists are instead encouraging people to be mindful of the words that they use to communicate with each other. One easy to implement suggestion is, rather than oversimplifying or using one blanket term, instead reflect on your feelings and use more words to describe exactly what it is that you are experiencing.
“If you’re wanting to call someone a narcissist,” Brown says, “what is it that I mean? I’m meaning that I experienced them as self-important and not really taking the time to notice other people’s needs. It’s okay to say that because that really clearly expresses what you’re thinking.”
It is undoubtedly still important for us to continue having open and honest conversations around mental health, especially given the mounting challenges that we, as a society, are facing in this post-pandemic world. However, these conversations can be made more constructive and beneficial to all parties if we make an effort to speak mindfully and be more careful with the words that we are using in our everyday conversations.
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